I have mentioned more than once that people like Cancer tend to categorize the people around them very clearly. The most important category for Cancer is the group of people who they believe would never hurt them. But before reaching that point, Cancer will definitely have a disguise in their expressions.
This disguise is a process for them. It is a way to discern who are the people that truly won’t harm them. If you spend a lot of time with Cancer in your daily life, you will find that almost no one can hear Cancer directly express their inner approval from the beginning.
Even if they think about taking you with them when they drive, paying for the meal and bringing back napkins, or preparing small surprises for you and buying a small toy for you, they find it very difficult to say words like “I think you’re great” or “I consider you a close friend.”
Even if they have a good impression of you and think you get along well, at most they will only praise you in front of others. On the contrary, if the relationship is not as close, Cancer will try to get closer through such expressions. Many people misunderstand this and think that Cancer doesn’t know how to express or that they save more love for less close people. But that’s not the case.
Cancer’s biggest advantage lies in their ability to quickly discern who can make them feel comfortable and who can be a threat to them in life. However, this advantage is also their vulnerability. After all, everyone has a disguise and shapes their own persona. Cancer worries that your state is just a facade, that you pretend to have a harmonious atmosphere to please them, but in reality, you are completely different. Shaping a persona takes time, and so does unveiling it.
What Cancer wants to do is give you an opportunity at the beginning and then leave the rest to time. They use some disguises to ensure your social experience with them. The apparent lies actually conceal the most genuine sincerity. Because Cancer is always worried, the more they worry, the less they dare to express themselves directly.
They worry that if they express their strong positive feelings to you, they will receive disappointing responses from you. They worry that if they show their unreserved thoughts to you, your opposing opinions will make both of them feel awkward. They worry that if they release their true selves to you, you will reject the unmasked Cancer.
Speaking should be an easy task, and no one wants to be misunderstood or insincere. But perhaps Cancer once, in their childhood, tried to gather all the courage in their heart and said, “I really enjoy playing with you, and I really want you to be by my side.” However, when they faced hesitation, doubts, and the other person’s casual attitude that unexpectedly pierced the softest part of their heart like a knife, they realized that learning to disguise seemed to be the inevitable path of their growth in expression.
Because for Cancer, as long as you spend enough time together, whether you are a friend, a lover, or a family member, many things don’t need to be judged as right or wrong. The person who stands by your side will always stand unconditionally.
“You didn’t start finding faults with me because you found something unpleasant.” “You must have found faults with me from the beginning, which led to you finding something unpleasant.”
The disguise is a fear of collapsing, and the person who can make them drop the disguise is undoubtedly the person who makes them no longer fear collapsing. Being able to express their true selves without defense is perhaps the most ideal state for Cancer.
Always remember to observe their actions, remember this.
They will try hard to remember all your preferences, and they hope you can notice every detail about them.
If you must focus on words, remember one thing: they might tell lies, but time never lies.
Believe me, but more importantly, believe them.
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